Result

Well partial results, I parted with more blood than I was happy to at doctor's this morning. She did very well considering there were no veins to be seen. None at all. I had a good look, she sipped a coffee whilst poking at my arm saying this is very curious. Then she did something fancy with tupperware style vials and a piece of cotton wool and out came the blood.

Partial results include; probably not lymphoma, possibly toxoplasmosis but she is just testing as a precaution, I am not in the habit of eating cat poo. Glandular fever is still in the running but she thinks it is unlikely to be my mystery disease. I am slightly alarmed that a GP working in the Newtown area does not know why I am sick. You see almost every possible thing walking down the streets around here so I thought that the doctors would somehow be super doctors adept at identifying mystery ailments in a matter of moments whilst muttering elementary my dear Watson and pocketing a cigar end. It is very sad when the world refuses to conform to my excellent idea of it.

I have another giant box of giant tablets to take, stern orders to not attempt to do anything at all and this includes going to work. I am not to go to work until she sees me again next Tuesday. I am hoping the mystery will be solved on that Tuesday morn, a miracle drug prescribed after which I will be required to have a cup of tea and lie down before rising fully recovered and able to eat dairy products with the greatest of ease. I am sure it will work out perfectly. A side effect of the miracle drug is that I will look astonishingly fetching and will bump into my future husband just outside the supermarket where he will immediately purchase flowers and run down the street after me. We will never again part after that first meeting. He is very kind and has many jackets, he despises baseball hats and he loves me. He will be very rich but I won't care and will marry him anyway. Oh dear I think the delirium is coming back.