Jetstar can get fucked. I had booked flights to go to Melbourne for the Melbourne Cup seeing as I scored a free ticket and a spot in a corporate tent, food and drink included. I don't normally like to go to the races, in fact it was only when The Spatula accidentally shoplifted* me a fascinator that I started to take the plan seriously.
Of course going to Melbourne on Saturday is completely out of the question now but because I booked a cheap flight with fucking Jetstar they are saying the ticket is non-refundable. I can change the date of my flight but there is a 'change fee' whatever the fuck that means. I can't find where it says how much that will be. I am very cross, I don't want to change the date of my flight. I don't want to fly anywhere. Walking to the station under my own power is an impossible dream let alone flying to some other city and walking around over there.
My return flight is with Virgin. I'm not even going to look them up until I have sat here yelling fuck weakly for a while longer. Maybe someone needs to fly to Melbourne this Saturday afternoon and wants to pretend to be me. I've done that before, taken someone else's flight, I spent ages memorising her personal details in case questioned. They didn't give a fuck they just looked the print out thing then let me on the plane and charged me five times the normal rate for a packet of twisties. I hate you Jetstar, I'm going to write a letter to Magda Szubanski.
* It was an accident, she had clipped it to her handbag with best intentions of paying for it but forgot that it was there, she paid for other shopping then had a mini heart attack after she had left the shop and realised she was a thief.
Of course going to Melbourne on Saturday is completely out of the question now but because I booked a cheap flight with fucking Jetstar they are saying the ticket is non-refundable. I can change the date of my flight but there is a 'change fee' whatever the fuck that means. I can't find where it says how much that will be. I am very cross, I don't want to change the date of my flight. I don't want to fly anywhere. Walking to the station under my own power is an impossible dream let alone flying to some other city and walking around over there.
My return flight is with Virgin. I'm not even going to look them up until I have sat here yelling fuck weakly for a while longer. Maybe someone needs to fly to Melbourne this Saturday afternoon and wants to pretend to be me. I've done that before, taken someone else's flight, I spent ages memorising her personal details in case questioned. They didn't give a fuck they just looked the print out thing then let me on the plane and charged me five times the normal rate for a packet of twisties. I hate you Jetstar, I'm going to write a letter to Magda Szubanski.
* It was an accident, she had clipped it to her handbag with best intentions of paying for it but forgot that it was there, she paid for other shopping then had a mini heart attack after she had left the shop and realised she was a thief.
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