Bah Newton, who needs you

Some days in Newtown everyone stares, some days I glide invisible and free, today people turned their heads away. Arriving home at the empty Peach I was tempted to crumble with back against the front door and just stay there for the night but my stubborn streak came in handy. I ditched things out of my bag and walked out into the street.

Madam Squeeze was squeezin' at the station cause some kid with a flute was playing carols in her usual spot. I finished my Christmas shopping in a book shop and settled down in some dim cafe with cracked purple bench seats for dinner. It was foul and unfamiliar, there are certain tastes I've come to expect from a hamburger and what I ate tonight was something else. Something sour and tasting of dirt.

Fatigue is interesting. If I had stopped to catch a bus towards home I would have stood and watched bus after bus roll past, completely unable to lift a foot and climb on board. I tried phoning some friends but the only one who answered has her own problems right now.

There is a stench in here this hour and I am beginning to suspect that its my rotting sense of self. I've no one to sit with on Christmas night and this one small empty evening is poking holes in everything else.

Comments

karen said…
I hate how nights like these can really put you off. They are the loneliest times ever, and arrive not for any explainable reason but just because they can.