The essay is not finished. I have stopped working on it at seven minutes to midnight. I have ceased to useful thoughts. Yes. It is nearly finished. I need only finish the appendices, stick in some handy references which I will find in my lunch break tomorrow. No. I am not normally an advocate of retrospective research.
This is uninteresting. My thoughts have begun to sway and it is not unpleasant, this kind of tired, the tired that comes at the end of being useful. I wish to say something, to write something, to pelt sentences like stones but there are none and I must content myself with the shuffling ritual of showering then finding my way into bed. I long to stay here in this calm white void state but I am slipping down in my chair, my eyelids lowering and raising like a moored ship. My lips are pressing together in a flat heavy line, my elbows and shoulders sink floorwards. All tension drains through the floor into the landlord's flat below. My tongue rests loose in the bottom of my mouth. Breath becomes motion as I rise and fall. I feel tidal.
This is uninteresting. My thoughts have begun to sway and it is not unpleasant, this kind of tired, the tired that comes at the end of being useful. I wish to say something, to write something, to pelt sentences like stones but there are none and I must content myself with the shuffling ritual of showering then finding my way into bed. I long to stay here in this calm white void state but I am slipping down in my chair, my eyelids lowering and raising like a moored ship. My lips are pressing together in a flat heavy line, my elbows and shoulders sink floorwards. All tension drains through the floor into the landlord's flat below. My tongue rests loose in the bottom of my mouth. Breath becomes motion as I rise and fall. I feel tidal.
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