Definitive

Special request. A definitions list for the cast of characters in Slammatown. Easy. This I can do. Much simpler than trying to define just how exactly that snorkeling makes me happy or why today when I sat on the edge of this continent with the lemon light behind me and nothing, oh nothing but that ocean, that I felt stitches pull tighter and empty places pop and vanish. I used to be scared of the edge of this land.

Not in any order.

Foto: Superman's friend. I like him, he lives near me, he seems kind and the verge of something, I'm not sure what but I'll stick around to find out.

Gemma:
Author of Gempires, owner of Cooper the small poodle. Gemma lives in Melbourne and visits Sydney occasionally. Gemma is super in all possible ways. Gemma is an honourary Peachette.

The Peachettes:
The Peachettes are residents or ex-residents of The Peach (my house).

The Spatula:
My friend for almost twenty years and a current Peachette. She is small. We met on the first day of high school. The Spatula sings, paints, massages and designs my zine "Ocarina". The Spatula is a necessary part of my context.

Leurf:
Cousin to The Spatula Leurf abandoned The Peach (she is still a Peachette) to pursue her studies in Perth which is a fucking long way away. Leurf is unpredictable, fantastic and stunning inside and out.

Grizelda:
Younger sister (8 years younger) of The Spatula and a current Peachette. Grizelda is an excellent chef but does not like to have hobbies. Grizelda is rapidly becoming a good friend.

Ron:
I like Ron, he's pretty tops.

My brother:
No explanation necessary. He is tall plays trombone professionally and has an unnatural love for all things flamingo.

Spencer:
Spencer is the walking talking home of rock. He fronts the band The Holy Soul. He sometimes wears a cowboy hat. Spencer went to university with my brother and Boli. His main squeeze is Madam Squeeze.

Madam Squeeze:
Madam Squeeze can often be found busking with her accordion on King St. She is a source of light.

Robert:
He is a poet. He often eats toast during the day, he has a plant on his desk called Sylvester the Abject Plant. He is quite excellent.

Boli:
I shared a house with Boli at university. He is a music therapist. He plays all the instruments to an excellent standard. He likes hats is recently married and is the man I phone to ask if I am being a spaz or not. He always tells me if I am being a spaz.

Mr X:
A friend of Elliot's. I don't see him very often. Sometimes I see him on King St, he does not appear to like me very much.

The Cowboy:
Lives next door. He sometimes sits out the back in a cowboy hat playing cowboy songs on his guitar.

Creamboy:
Author of More Boring Rants from Anonymous Eccentrics. Creamboy is Superman's brother.

Superman:
This is what I used to think about Superman: I high three Superman, he is excellent. He has a way of not letting me panic, the best way to describe is that he makes me stand on a platform which is higher than where I normally stand and I can see more, further forward, further back and with some clarity. He is immensely silly and quite possibly the most stubborn person I have ever met. When he makes a decision you can hear the clang of an iron gate dropping somewhere in the distance. We wrote a song. Superman is Creamboy's brother.

Now I don't think about Superman at all, I do sometimes think about Superman movies but that is not the same thing.

Elliot:
I once thought I loved Elliot. I fucked him more than once with little sexual success. He used to be an excellent friend. I haven't heard from him since I told him I wouldn't see him if he's drunk. He's back in rehab.

Artboy:
The ex. After seven odd years of living together he developed a major mental illness. He had a manic episode and literally went screaming out into the night. He did not come back. This is how our relationship ended. This is how my heart fractured. I sank to the floor and it took me a while to stand back up.

Benito Di Fonzo:
A man that I can not talk to because every time I see him my head empties of all words and I stand there like a fucktard. Once I went to a party with him and set my hair on fire in the bathroom. This was not on purpose. Benito is the author of Benito Di Fonzo Jr & The Loneliness of the Long Distance Writer.

Slammas:
My family.
Mum, her partner (I don't have a name for her on this blog), my brother, Dad, his wife (I don't have a name for her on this blog). Various relatives occasionally pop up, very occasionally.

Sylvia:
Gemma reminded me that I have not written a definition for her. Initially I did not use the cat's name in order to protect her privacy however I have since realised that this is ridiculous. The cat does not have any friends with the internet. Sylvia is a Norwegian Forest Cat, she is four years old.

Zissou:
I met him at a party, at my house on new year's eve, he stayed the night. We met for drinks, he stayed the night. He said "are we going to do this again?" I said "call me sometime" he said "I will". He called, we met another two times. He is a good man. He moved interstate for work, this made me sad.

The Beautiful Boys:
A bunch of beautiful boys of a literary bent. I admire them greatly for their verve, intellect, joy and youth.

Failed Ant Farmers:
Members are Superman, Spencer and Madam Squeeze and me.

There is more but really today I cannot be bothered.

I think this is all. I should make links but oh I am lazy, so lazy. I am tired from swimming in Clovelly Bay for hours on end. The ocean is battering this continent so a sheltered beach was necessary but still, it was the edge of things.

Comments

NWJR said…
This is a most excellent list, a great source for future posts, and the generator of the longest list of labels I have yet seen this year. Thank you!
Gemnastics said…
you have forgotten sylvia the cat.
Anonymous said…
Norsk Skoggkatt? I think you should buy more items from Ikea to make her feel more... scandinavian
She needs a forest of Ivar!
DS said…
Oh no. Ivar is so over. It's all about Billy now.
Anonymous said…
Hey you! I love that I am characterised by the amount of time between moves... Humph!

I have got a city full of supervillains to take care of, you know. One'd think a little appreciation might have been in order.

Oh well, I'll go and listen to Crash Test Dummies. At least THEY understand my troubles.

(dumm dum de de...never made any money... solomon grundy... sometimes I despair...)

(sigh)
Anonymous said…
Hack

Ok, I'm in. Umm,

Fart.

Yeah, huh huh. Are you like, um, some kind of writer or something?

huh huh, yeah.

You wrote sex. wow, sex.
Anonymous said…
huh huh, she didn't delete it.

maybe i should like , swear or something?

huh huh huh...
DS said…
I'm not a writer I'm a word arranger.
Anonymous said…
As am I. Huh huh.. yeah.

I adore the concept of Plagerism.

Ummm, yeah. Yeah.

None of my work is my work.

Huh huh.. It's everyone else's work renamed as mine.

Work is dull.

Gotta go. Time's up and I'm tight.
Anonymous said…
A forrest of ivar? Billy? It all sounds narcotic. Escapism...?
DS said…
It all started in Sweden.
Anonymous said…
oh, um, yeah....
Anonymous said…
Hmmm, she's reading them first. Good idea to retain full control of other people's thoughts. She used to let posts go straight on. Hmmm, maybe some have dared to disagree?

How dare those souls.

How dare those who dare to.

I wonder if this will get posted then? Hang on, that sounds like the kettle. Bye bye
DS said…
Wow! My blog controls thoughts! This is a new and interesting super power. I will begin my reign of terror by saying this:

People of the world hear me and obey my thoughts. You will develop a sudden urge to grow vegetables, bake cakes and throw dinner parties. Also you will send me money. Lots of money.
Anonymous said…
allow the posts to go straight on then
DS said…
My posts do go straight on.
Anonymous said…
Who is Roger?
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