Me. Der. That really goes without saying. Elliot managed to spend a night away from rehab, with me and now I'm a fucktard or possibly an emotard but most certainly some kind of tard. This morning he woke up before me and popped out to the kitchen and came back with cups of tea which was of course lovely. The whole thing was lovely from start to finish and this is why I'm now having problems.
He's too lovely. So lovely that when he goes away instead of spending the rest of the day thinking that was great I have a tendency to sit on the floor and notice how the air in my room seems thinner now. I have an overwhelming need to peer into the future and find out what happens. I'm done with patience and understanding. Is this man going to stay on his feet in this world? Is he going to walk out of rehab and down the street and bump into someone amazing and marry her? Am I going to end up crying, the wedding invitation in my hands?
What possible courses of action are there, cause I'm nothing if not a woman of action. I don't think there are any unless I can somehow hire a team of invisible people to.... To do what? Fast forward time to where he is living in a normal house and... and what? Oh for fuck's sake this is all getting highly irritating maybe I should just murder him and solve the whole situation once and for all. I could ask Creamboy for some tips on undetectable murdering techniques (this is because he is a Dr Creamboy and not because he is a murdering Creamboy). Or I could race down the street and grab any man and marry him and then Elliot would get my wedding invitation and then he would die of some sort of something and everything would be great. I could try and turn into a lesbian and then I could marry Gemma (if she was also a lesbian) and then Elliot would die and everything would be great. Or I could marry Jesus and get bad shoes and be a nun or I could go and live in Siberia and die slowly from parts of me freezing and then going black and squishy and squishing off. Or how about plan F? Yes. Hang on let me do that one.
Ok its done. I'm meeting Mr X in the pub tomorrow night, that ought to do it at least for a day or two.
He's too lovely. So lovely that when he goes away instead of spending the rest of the day thinking that was great I have a tendency to sit on the floor and notice how the air in my room seems thinner now. I have an overwhelming need to peer into the future and find out what happens. I'm done with patience and understanding. Is this man going to stay on his feet in this world? Is he going to walk out of rehab and down the street and bump into someone amazing and marry her? Am I going to end up crying, the wedding invitation in my hands?
What possible courses of action are there, cause I'm nothing if not a woman of action. I don't think there are any unless I can somehow hire a team of invisible people to.... To do what? Fast forward time to where he is living in a normal house and... and what? Oh for fuck's sake this is all getting highly irritating maybe I should just murder him and solve the whole situation once and for all. I could ask Creamboy for some tips on undetectable murdering techniques (this is because he is a Dr Creamboy and not because he is a murdering Creamboy). Or I could race down the street and grab any man and marry him and then Elliot would get my wedding invitation and then he would die of some sort of something and everything would be great. I could try and turn into a lesbian and then I could marry Gemma (if she was also a lesbian) and then Elliot would die and everything would be great. Or I could marry Jesus and get bad shoes and be a nun or I could go and live in Siberia and die slowly from parts of me freezing and then going black and squishy and squishing off. Or how about plan F? Yes. Hang on let me do that one.
Ok its done. I'm meeting Mr X in the pub tomorrow night, that ought to do it at least for a day or two.
Comments
xox rups
R: If only the thoughts were dancing, I think they are marching rather than dancing. Marching straight to doom! Doom! I am doomed! That's really fun to say. I recommend yelling three times loudly I am doomed! Sure to put a smile on your dial.
Rups xo