The cat is slipping, she should be maintaining constant vigilance for we are at war but she is curled asleep on the mohair blanket. She may be paw shocked.
The mean cat once again breached our defences yesterday. There were no casualties but the cat herself fought valiantly paw to paw in the hallway while I covered her with steady water pistol fire from Grizelda's bedroom.
Morale is at an all time low and we are keeping the back door firmly shut against attack from the rear. 10:27 and as yet no sign of the mean cat this morning. I am beginning to fear the worst. I believe an alliance has been formed between the mean cat and the bad cat and its only a matter of time before we suffer the blow of a double attack.
We are running low on ammunition, the dams are at less than 50% and the trigger on the water spray bottle in the bathroom is starting to stick. I am arguing to send to the mountains for urgent reinforcements but The Spatula maintains that we can hold our ground without the devastating and reprehensible use of Horatio the Great Dane. It is my firm belief that he could lay a secure a perimeter by marking the fence line but the others are reluctant to agree to such a course of action. They do not believe that residual dog wee will prevent another attack. I am worried that Horatio might try and eat the cat but what choice do we have? Our situation is becoming desperate. I must maintain an appearance of strength, I must be resolute. The cat needs a show of leadership now more than ever.
Faster forwards future soldiers, the end is not yet in sight.
The mean cat once again breached our defences yesterday. There were no casualties but the cat herself fought valiantly paw to paw in the hallway while I covered her with steady water pistol fire from Grizelda's bedroom.
Morale is at an all time low and we are keeping the back door firmly shut against attack from the rear. 10:27 and as yet no sign of the mean cat this morning. I am beginning to fear the worst. I believe an alliance has been formed between the mean cat and the bad cat and its only a matter of time before we suffer the blow of a double attack.
We are running low on ammunition, the dams are at less than 50% and the trigger on the water spray bottle in the bathroom is starting to stick. I am arguing to send to the mountains for urgent reinforcements but The Spatula maintains that we can hold our ground without the devastating and reprehensible use of Horatio the Great Dane. It is my firm belief that he could lay a secure a perimeter by marking the fence line but the others are reluctant to agree to such a course of action. They do not believe that residual dog wee will prevent another attack. I am worried that Horatio might try and eat the cat but what choice do we have? Our situation is becoming desperate. I must maintain an appearance of strength, I must be resolute. The cat needs a show of leadership now more than ever.
Faster forwards future soldiers, the end is not yet in sight.
Comments
At times like these, both of them seem alarmingly stupid, for cats.
the power to subdue someone by remaining still on them. you dont dare move for fear of unleashing her super-power wrath